And Then It Rained

We finally have some seasonal weather. That pouring rain that goes all night long and leaves everything thoroughly soaked has been and gone a couple of times. Our first significant rainfall since early spring. The succulents suddenly bloomed and now I'm hauling them close to the house for shelter from the cold dips in temperature we often get this high on the hillside in November and December. The lemons are ripening and the winter garden is emerging.

Caelen selecting a pumpkin for Halloween

Austen is in his third month of attending both a Waldorf forest preschool two days a week and a more traditional preschool the rest of the week. Caelen has a couple of different nannies who cover me every day while I work. He got into the groove very quickly. He's nearly finished potty training already and will turn two in December. Austen's preschool is letting Caelen enroll in January due to his signs of readiness (the usual age limit is 2 1/2). This will really thrill him. He wants to go with Austen each day so badly and Austen is so excited to have him join him. They won't be together at a school like this again for another three years.

Speaking of school we are registering Austen for Kindergarten for next fall. I am hoping for him to be accepted into a full time outdoor Waldorf program. They have the most magical venue and Austen is in love with the place after his tour. It doesn't hurt that most of his close friends are headed there too. So fingers crossed everyone! It's a lottery.

Joel is busy as always. It seems like he's been on a work trip nearly every week since the school year began. He's been home most weekends and for a few weekdays here and there but it's been pretty sparse. The boys are pretty used to being just with me and we have our routines down but there are always sad bedtime goodnights. I can't wait for the holiday season mostly because the travel ends for a little while.

My company is picking up lots of speed at last now that the kids are taken care of for a stretch each day. I took some time this year to really think about who I want to work with and what direction I want to take my portfolio. A maternity leave is both a curse—because it takes years to get caught up to your peers again— and a blessing—because you can change course and no one really notices the shift except you. I never had to cut loose my science & tech companies before I veered off to serve arty boutique companies. I'm happier and no one had to get ruffled about it. I post things I'm working on all the time if you are curious.

Everyone is still asking if we got the new Green Cards yet. No. Joel just checked the processing times and they are now processing Nov of 2016 and we are early Feb 2017 so I figure early Feb 2018 we should be good to go. But who knows. We're all itchy to travel and even taking about expatriation for a short stint if something comes up that looks good. One expats, always expats. Can we ever settle?

Love, Smoke and Community

October 2017 will go down in my memory as a tangle of highs and lows. I find it's always best to talk about the highs first so I'll share our happy 10th wedding anniversary/Canadian Thanksgiving celebration. Every year we gather our family and some close friends together and do a sit-down dinner for around 30 guests. This year we decided to get a little more romantic and tie in our 10th anniversary which was back in August but we hadn't really celebrated it yet. We always go "all out" for our Thanksgiving but this time I added a rack of crystal champagne glasses to the usual party rental order and got a little more involved with flowers. And then I needed these linens and well... it turned out really beautifully. Here's a peek:

It was a perfect clear warm evening and we toasted the event reading aloud our wedding vows we'd kept in our album all these years. Such wonderful food and company. We felt like a bride and groom again. 

My parents as well as some very dear friends came to town for the occasion and stayed for a few days after. At about 2am on Monday morning Joel awoke - we think the cat, Kopi-o, woke him - to our house filling with wood smoke. He leaped into action and closed every window and checked Next Door to see where the fire was. Sonoma. We were safe but the smoke was thick and luckily with his fast movements hardly any of us even woke till the morning. At breakfast, amid the hum of air cleaners, we looked out on ash that almost seemed like snow falling. The 50mph winds had also dumped a shower of burnt 1-2" black twigs all over the ground in the night. 

It's been hard to read the news each day. Fires breaking out all across Northern California and very seriously across the North Bay. People caught unaware in bed as freak high winds caused the fire to leap from one hilltop to the next. So many were never warned. Some evacuated and some never made it out. And the flames have marched on, continuing to destroy homes and take lives over the past six days. The most deadly forest fire in California's history and it's not over yet. 

It's barely an hour away which in itself is a bit scary. But lets be real, there are a lot of things between us and the fires so those particular blazes aren't the reason I packed a "go bag" for each of us just in case. Marin and most of the East Bay have been issued a red flag warning. It happens quite a lot to us at this time of year. It means if anything sparks it will burn fast and threaten nearby communities and make evacuations extremely fast. So they issue these warnings to keep us on our toes. We have never really taken much notice in the past but this week each red flag has been sobering. 

Air quality is a huge concern for us. Caelen has had eye irritation to the point of hives and blisters, Austen has a sore under his nose and we've all had a dry cough. We have those trusty n95 masks like the Singapore smog days of the past. The kids actually like their cute masks and we wear them whenever we have to go out. It does help. 

Fairfax has been like a ghost town. Everyone heeding the health advisory and staying indoors. Schools have been closed due not only to air quality but also so many teachers were evacuated they can't run the schools safely. 

We've taken some day trips out of the smoke and enjoyed some sunshine on Stinson Beach and around San Francisco. No matter where we go, no one's mind is really at peace. Every interaction with others begins with "is your family safe?" and exchanges of "good luck" replace "goodbye" in nearly every setting. We've talked to a lot of evacuees and have decided to open our own home to a family in need. Amazingly enough, I checked online and saw that there were hundreds of available homes willing to take in evacuees. It's heartwarming. As quickly as shelters post their needs online, I see follow-up messages saying "we're ok! No need for more stuff" as they are flooded with donations. There are still lots of needs to be filled but it's really important, with so many helping, to check the most up to date lists first!

Today is our first day of clear air. Some of the fires are contained - which is to say they aren't spreading but still burning. The death toll this morning was updated and will continue to climb. I hope the worst is over now. To all my friends around the Bay, I hope you are safe and good luck.

Travel in Flux

Who knew a split second would change our entire year? Caelen putting Austen's and my Green Cards in some mysterious place has meant we are in a queue to get new ones for likely over a year. Our trip to Europe was canceled. Joel was able to bank his sabbatical and we'll attempt this next Summer. Austen was especially bummed out about the change of plans so we booked a short trip to SoCal to visit both Disneyland and Legoland and our friends down that way. It was a success and took everyone's mind off yearning for the Tuscan hills.

Our Summer Travel Destination Will Be...

Europe! Yes, we are taking the boys on a 9-hour flight at ages 18 months and 4. Austen, who has difficulty with sitting still for all 10 minutes of circle time at preschool is probably going to love sitting in his seat for an entire day but what can I say. We're gluttons for punishment.

The plan is to spend a chunk of time in Italy somewhere in Tuscany. We will be having a little reunion with some dear friends we miss so much from our time in Singapore. We'll also be finishing our travels with a week in London. Nothing is booked yet, no dates are set in stone but the wheels are churning.

Apocalypse: Week One

It begins! #WomensMarch #sfo #Sfwomensmarch pic.twitter.com/Jh7mCWV74F

— Stacey (@singaporestacey) January 22, 2017

It was worse than we thought. Much, much worse. On January 21st, like millions of people around the world we took to the streets to walk in the Women's March. San Francisco was the last city to walk. The sun went down and the rain poured but we followed an energetic hopeful crowd into the night and were filled with awe. The power of many is a great elixir for the tired, the scared and the unheard. I tried out Facebook live and streamed in my friends and family, my sister-in-law who was visiting came with us. It was a powerful day. But it was just one day.

Executive order after executive order from the Tweeter-in-chief has assaulted the nation with more catastrophic humans rights issues than any of us have the bandwidth to fully comprehend. My god, do I freak out about my rights as a women or the continuing abuses on the front lines of the DAPL protests? Oh wait there's more. The Affordable Care Act is on the chopping block leaving millions to suffer. Climate change disappeared from the government website and gag orders were signed limiting the free speech of government scientists and now THE MUSLIM BAN IS REAL. I just can't process the horror of reading that Syrian refugees who went through the most rigorous vetting process imaginable and traveled all the way to the US were then held. Some deported on arrival but many just in limbo. The cruelty of this defies any logic. It's like a cat playing with its prey for amusement.

I wanted to run down to SFO and join in with my fellow horrified humans but I read a little blurb about who should and who shouldn't go to these airport protests. There in black and white the words "permanent residents and visa holders, do not put yourself in harm's way" and then I realized that's me. I'd be in harm's way. My status does make my opinions less safe. If protestors are arrested or even questioned at some point anyone with a mere Green Card as their anchor to this tumultuous land might have it stripped away. I have to find another way to help. I've signed stuff, I donate to the ACLU (and so can you here https://www.aclu.org/action) and now we wait for someone else to fight for us on this one.

Ahead of us, we have more peaceful marches and some opportunities to be in the numbers. I have more love for Canada right now than I know what to do with. I am so proud of the way these ridiculous issues are being dealt with at home - except for the pipeline seriously Canada get a grip on that one -- but I still care too much about California to walk away. This is our home now. We stay, we fight as long as we can.

Looking Forward: Our Hopes for 2017

We have travel plans brewing for this coming year. Not only are we doing some fun California things but we're also trying out the Home Exchange idea with sights set on Italy in August during Joel's sabbatical he's taking from work this year. We've always stayed in people's homes when we travel either through VRBO or Air BnB but haven't yet done a home swap. We're using homeexchange.com and are still in the beginning stages of learning how it all works. More to come as we move forward with this adventure. 

Joel has a few house projects on the go. He's putting the finishing touches on the home theatre with a projector and screen that will be discreetly tucked into the ceiling when not in use. That's been a bit of an obsession. 

I'm having some fun decorating the boys room and trying to figure out a future bathroom renovation project though I'm perfectly happy to not have any renos on the go just at the moment. The kitchen reno was far more involved than we ever imagined it and we've promised ourselves that no matter how dated it becomes in 30 years we will never do that again. 

I'm hopefully back to work in January after taking a Canadian style mat leave from running my design business. Time to hire a nanny again and renew my business license. Austen is in his second year of preschool and as soon as Caelen hits 18 months he can go there too. It will be pretty neat to send them off to Summer camp day programs together. Caelen is a little more attached to me than Austen was at this age so he might not love this plan as much as I do. 

Joel's work has been exciting of late. This week he's just flying back from Switzerland and Germany where he's been in meetings and taking in a few sights along the way. He's still really enjoying being on the software side of the entertainment industry and not missing the craziness of working on feature films. I also prefer this life to the one we spent in hotels and temporary digs. Fewer celebrities but a much more stable life for our family. 

We wish all of our family and friends and blog followers a very happy everything you celebrate at this time of year and all the best for the new year. 

November 8

November 8th we put the kids to bed and sat down to watch the election coverage. Expecting a sweep of blue -- like the last Canadian election -- we instead saw red. We switched from CNN to PBS -- the public broadcasting station -- to search for a more intellectual opinion and watched as seasoned political analysts stumbled over their words. Unable to mask their own shock (and horror). Our newly minted confidence in a more progressive America shattered. We held hands and I cried.

I woke on November 9th furious and scared. I knew every visible minority would be at risk of being roughed up by emboldened bigots on this day and the weeks to come. We spoke to friends, checked in with neighbours. We donated to the American Civil Liberties Union and Planned Parenthood. Our friends asked us, "will you go back to Canada now?" And we said, "No, we stay, we fight. This is our home too."

The anti-Trump sentiment in the San Francisco Bay and Los Angeles areas is loud and proud. People are organizing, donating, debating every aspect of the incoming regime. I feel like people are remembering the political activism of California in the 60s and 70s and drawing not only from the baby boomers years of experience but the ideas of the tech-savvy millennials. I feel hopeful and at least safe and supported here right now.

Canadian Thanksgiving Year Two

Last year we hosted our first big Canadian Thanksgiving dinner at our new home and welcomed 22 of our friends and family here for an amazing meal. This year our numbers swelled to 32 and I like to think we honed our skills a little more with this being our second attempt at having such a large gathering.

As with the first year we did a sit-down meal. Moving our furniture outside onto the decks and moving rented tables in to accommodate the numbers. Guests brought side dishes and we did a 23lb turkey, a salmon and tri-tip and many many potatoes. I hired two local high school students to keep the kids entertained so parents could eat and enjoy themselves. It worked out very well. I only saw a brief glimpse of Austen who was having the time of his life.

People came from near and far. We had four of our guests drive and fly up from LA (7-8 hour drive) and my brother flew down from Vancouver. Lots of folks clocked in several hours driving from around the Bay Area with littles in the car to get here too. Quite amazing to have people put out all that effort to make this year such a success. Hats off to my brother, Adrian who did an amazing amount of prep work with us in the days prior. We could not have made all that food happen without him.

Maple cookies (my little baking contribution)

One of the tables set for dinner

Farewell Montreal

Our final week in Montreal wrapped up with the hottest days of our trip. Lots of swimming in the public pools and iced coffees in cafes. Our sweltering Air BnB place for the week was not the best choice but we made the most of the location. We had a family meal out at Maison Publique  and did some epic walks around the city and then we packed up for the airport. 

Heading home after five weeks away was strange and but also a relief. We learned so much about travel with two under four on this trip. Probably the most important thing I learned is that trailing along on a trip when Joel is working not all that much fun for me. Our side trips on the weekends were fantastic but the week days with Joel gone and me alone with the kids with no network or activities like preschool... it was daunting and isolating. The fun side trips told me that the kids are really happy to travel, we function really well as a family on the move and we plan to travel more in the future. 

I Dream of Cottage Country

I lived near the thousand islands until the age of ten and like most kids growing up in Ontario, Summer was all about lake swimming and going to cottages. I fished, caught frogs, paddled inner tubes out to catch the wakes of passing boats and tried to build viable rafts from found objects. I loved the sound of the lake lapping at the underside of the dock as I lay still watching the fish swim in the sunny shallows below.

One of my best friends grew up in a family that owned a cottaging business with 15 cottages and as I planned our trip this Summer she and I conspired to get us out to her family's cottages for the ultimate Ontario lake experience. Everything fell into place and we just came back from three of the most fun days we've ever had as a family.