Second Month Locked Down

This week feels new. It's week five, after four that really were a smudgy blur. The boys have each processed their trauma from this drastic change in their lives and come to a place of peace with it -- at least for now. It has't been pretty. Their rage has been huge, and almost always directed at me. After rage came all the crying, and then quiet, and then hugs.

I've done the same process in the adult form. After the initial adrenaline and fear launched me through the first week, I started to sleep a lot, and wander around disengaged, keeping earbuds in  half listening to an audiobook to escape from the seemingly endless loop of housewifedom I had entered. I said goodbye to my business, my goals, and the autonomy I've clawed my way toward for seven years. It's not gone forever, but it needed to be put to rest for now so I can get down to the work at hand.

Easter came and went in that peaceful new space we had entered. We've begun moving in tiny concentric circles of play this week, and are not missing anything all that much. 

We moved our "schooling" life outdoors. Setting up our supplies with a small nod to the Waldorf traditions but with the flexibility of not having to adhere to anything that doesn't interest us in that moment. Everyone is happier with this open learning plan. 

We planted our "victory garden" a few weeks ago and it sprouted fast. We'll be growing all our salad greens this Spring/Summer/Fall. 

Bread has been my therapy. I finally made legit baguettes and a good first stab at laminated pastry.

Joel has been a rock through all this. He's had to keep getting up at 5:30am to take meetings and drive his company forward. He's poised to somehow still have one of the most successful years of his career and yet in all that endless work he's managed to be a hands-on Dad and has summoned the energy to cook dinner nearly every night. We are learning to make fancy cocktails and create our date nights with whatever we have. It's not all bad.