Disclaimer: I'm not a child travel expert. I've been at this for just three years and I only have two kids. We have survived more than 20 flights ranging from 19 hours to little 2 hour hops. And we've done a myriad of road trips varying in length from 4 to 10 hours.
What's the best time to take a first trip with my baby?
That depends on a few factors. The first being the healing time you need port-birth. If you're up and walking and carrying your baby for long walks and feeling emotionally stable, you can probably tackle a little trip. For some mothers that's at two weeks and others that's at eight, ten...twelve. Don't compare yourself to anyone else and for god's sake don't let anyone bully you into buying plane tickets before your baby is born.
The other factor is the biggest wild card: your baby. Is your baby very sensitive? You won't know till they make their appearance. A very sensitive baby might hate every single detail of travel from the smells to the din of the airport. Also if you little one is suffering from colic or any intestinal upset common in the first 12 weeks you'll have yours hands full enough at home. A trip might not be very fun for anyone involved.
So my answer? Travel when you and your baby are feeling stable, healthy and happy. For me that was at six weeks. I was comfortable with baby-wearing, nursing in public and my baby could sleep through a train wreck or a concert and be well rested. I call that plain old luck.
Should we fly or drive?
Again, it depends on how high or low your babies needs are. How often do you need to nurse and change baby? Remember you can't do these things while your car is moving. With a newborn a road trip can be more of a "side of the road" trip. Some babies are lulled to sleep by the car, other turn into Jack Jack. My first son was a flaming ball of rage the moment we got into the car unless he was asleep or taking a bottle of expressed milk which required me to be in the back seat pumping while hubby drove us to our next rest stop. Pure hell people. For him, plane = happy baby, car = rage. My little guy slept the entire way from Singapore to LA without a peep at 8 weeks. I had to check if he was breathing. He nursed and slept and no one knew he was on the plane. However, some babies hate planes and love the car. I have no secret formula for this. Experiment. Take a short trip before committing to a long one.
What stroller do you take?
It depends on the age of your kid, what stroller they are used to and how much schlepping you plan on doing. With a newborn you probably want to wear baby and check the stroller at the start of your trip so make sure you have a sturdy flight case. With an older baby you probably can't baby wear for an entire day and will need a more simple travel stroller you can gate check easily. (read: one you can fold with one hand). Polling my expat traveller parents we all seem to have two favorites for the travel stroller. The Bugaboo Bee or a Mclaren. I personally prefer the Bee because it folds easily, is smoother to push around (it doesn't have those godawful double wheels) and it lies flat for naps so it works as a great place to take a nap on the go. But that's me. Take something you are comfortable with and that your airline will gate check.
What other gear do I need?
The gear, yes... it can get out of hand easily. Nix your own carry-on bag and adopt your diaper bag as your sidekick. You can technically bring both carry-on and diaper bag as babies are allowed their own bag BUT consider that baby doesn't bring own porter. This is you. You have two arms.
What goes into that bag is up to you but here's what's in mine:
- Diapers (bring more than you use at home for the same period of time.)
- Wipes
- Small garbage bags
- At least 3 pacifiers
- Anything you need for feeding.
- Two changes of shirt and one change of pants for YOURSELF. DO NOT OMIT THIS
- Three changes of clothes for baby
- A favourite toy (puppets are really helpful)
- Baby tylenol just in case baby gets sick. You don't want to be on a long flight with a feverish infant and no way to reduce fever. This seems like a basic "who'd forget that?" item but lots of folks forget it in the chaos of packing.
-Extra swaddle to drape over sleeping baby
And because I like to be really prepared:
- Sanitizing wipes for surfaces like arm rests and dirty change tables
- A little teething kit with anything I need to deal with a sudden round of gum discomfort
For an older baby
- An ipad. I said I would never and then Elmo. Sigh. Elmo is my hero.
- Snacks and snacks and snacks
- Water bottle
- Bandaids and arnica because toddlers crash into things constantly
See? Nothing really special. You probably already own all these things.
When was the hardest time to travel with my baby?
As soon as he started to walk. As first time parents we were overjoyed for about a day. And then we realized we should have locked him in a bouncer and only crawled around on the floor in his presence so he wouldn't get any bright ideas. Maybe then we'd have two more months of sanity like everyone else in our due date group. Like every stage, you freak out and then you adjust. The first time you travel with a toddler will be memorable and then you'll figure out your coping pattern.
Anything else we should know?
If you book your infant their own seat and bring a rear facing carseat on board you need to buy seats in the "Plus" section with extra legroom. They do not fit in the standard economy class seats. The ticket agents somehow have no idea.
When you use the awful change table over the toilet in the plane bathroom PUT THE SEAT LID DOWN.
If you are travelling alone use all the help you can get. Splurge on a porter. Check all your baggage possible. When the kind flight attendant asks if you need anything say YES. You need endless bottles of water, someone to hold baby so that YOU can use the bathroom and you need them to bring your dinner later because you have a baby on your boob at the moment it happens to arrive. They do these things for parents all the time. It's OK to ask for help. I don't let strangers walk my baby up and down the aisle but I have let flight attendants do this if they offer.
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