Hosting Again

To me, one of life's greatest pleasures in that moment of a house brimming with energy, laughter, clinking glasses. That moment when a party starts to run on its own energy and you get to enjoy it fully. Everything up to that point is a bit of a mad dash, little details, cooking and baking and decorating. Anticipating needs and crossing things off lists. There's a deep creative pleasure for me in creating tables for gathering. I think about it and collect pieces all year. My co-conspirator in these plans has always been Renee, who my kids call Gigi. She's an antique collector and creator of really creative and spectacular events in her home. She's always pushing the envelope with quirky fun ideas mixed with history and then above all... comfort. Nothing should be too austere. 

My other co-conspirator in great hosting escapade is often Nancy. My BFF of 34 years from Eastern Ontario homeschooling days. This year she flew down to visit just in time to help me pull off this event.

My client, Heirlooms Events, loaned us linens, tables, chairs, crystal (and those moss colored hobnail tumblers that were amazing) and Renee, who was in the middle of downsizing her home, sent up a collection of hotel silver to hold flowers. I scored a whole bucket of dahlias at Trader Joe's the day before. They turned out just the way I'd hoped. Those dewy peachy petals juxtaposing the tarnished silver. 

It was a lovely afternoon and night, with lots of hugs and catching up. I wish Renee had been able to come up and join us too. Jessica made it up from LA though and the following morning, after SO much cleaning, Nancy, Jess and I hatched a plan to decompress and do the opposite of hosting...

Summer Cottage on a lake

It's the key ingredient of a Canadian kid's Summer if you live in the Eastern provinces with lots of lakes. Having grown up in cottage country it was odd when we moved to BC at age 10 and there were relatively few warm, clear lakes to dive into in the Summer. There were also few days that got warm enough to want to swim! A BC Summer is more like spring weather, wet, breezy with occasional warmer days but it rarely gets sticky hot. When we lived in Vancouver all my Ontario Summer clothes lived in a bag. And after moving to hotter climates we have learned not to bring things like flip flops and sun dresses with us in July because they just live in the suitcase. We were utterly astonished this Summer to be arriving for our first ever heat wave during a BC Summer. 

When we got to the cottage with Joel's family we were treated to weather that was right out of an Eastern Ontario childhood. Jumping in the warm lake multiple times a day to stay cool. Sitting by a fan with a cool drink after. Warm evenings playing long competitive games of Risk and pulling out the secret stashes of treats we hid when the kits were up. 

We also had really lovely weather to have a lot of outdoor time in Sooke with my family and music festival time with my brother and his family. Joel and I got away for one night to the Empress Hotel where we wined and dined and got a luxurious sleep in. 

Roaring 20s and COVID

Do we, or don't we?  the parent party committee mused over Zoom. The gloomy chart from the Country showed the COVID levels in the wastewater were in a bullish upward trend. Parents were expecting us to put on the first year-end party in two school years. But imagining people filling the indoor venue didn't sit right. What if we have a super spreader event and land our little charter school in the local papers? There's a journalist there that just won't be able to resist tearing us a new one. 

We drew up a new plan to have everything outdoors for our roaring 20s fete. The setting was stunning, with twinkling lights under the canopy of redwood trees. Black and gold decor hung from everywhere, dancers demonstrated the Charleston, the bar was stocked with supplies to make my signature cocktail list: French 75, Sidecar, Old Fashioned. We pulled it off! And it was beautiful.

This shindig coincided with my parent's visit down from Canada. They'd arrived a week before, in time for us to have a fun weekend with the final season baseball games and family dinners. Then I got sick with a sinus infection and after isolating for a few days and testing negative each day, I opted for antibiotics and immediately got better. Phew, I thought! I dodged COVID again. I was better in time to enjoy the event I'd helped plan and we got that glittering evening in. 

We had a lovely weekend after that, brunch at our Barefoot Cafe in Fairfax and a hike in Deer Park with the kids and a late evening scrabble game for the adults. 

Monday morning I woke with heavy, wet-feeling lungs, a bit of asthma. I wandered upstairs to grab a cup of coffee and a Zyrtec. Once back downstairs again I thought, well maybe I should do a rapid test. The tiniest of tiny test lines faded into view and I just froze in shock. That began a the frantic process of isolating me downstairs again. I diligently reported my test to the County, they responded by texting me  my quarantine schedule. Then I did the iphone exposure notification for the state of California which pings all close contacts from the past few days. That was a little less simple as I had to get a number sent to me by the state health department to put into that app but it worked. I reached out to the parent party organizing committee members from the party and heard one other person had tested positive the same time but with so much going around, we likely weren't even linked. 

And so that was day one. I quickly developed a fever, cough, headache and nausea and joint pains that were more severe than I've had in the last 20 years. I was not expecting a breakthrough infection for me to be this dramatic. I couldn't keep anything down, not even liquids. I had a call with a nurse to monitor my O2 and a follow up the following day from a Dr of Internal medicine and was put onto prescription anti nauseant so I could take in fluids again. 

I had three days of being phenomenally ill and thinking I might get rolled out of this place on a gurney afterall, and then on day four it turned and started to recede. Just as the Dr said it would. By now Joel had joined me in my quarantine lair, only he won the lottery and got the cold version. He had a feverish night and lingering cough but really never got very sick. Our story is pretty typical of Omicron. People are getting either this harsh flu or a cold and then it goes away. We felt we were being pretty careful still when we caught it. We were not dining indoors, we were masking with KN95 masks for shops and school, and being very conservative with any socializing. I think I may have picked it up having a drink outside on a patio at a local cocktail bar. My Dr. confirmed that yes, many people are reporting the same suspicions about outdoor spread. "It's just that contagious now" she said. 

My parents have been isolating with the boys upstairs. Joel and I, with our own house entrance are well set up to isolate in the lower part of the house. Joel even taped up the air return vent (he laughed that it reminded him of Station Eleven). My parents have been delivering meals to us (we've been ordering in a lot) and leaving all kinds of needed items outside our door. The boys are enjoying some grandparent time and lots of hikes. They haven't tested positive or been sick at all. After a week of isolating from us they went back to school today and are taking in their last three days of school before Summer holidays begin.

And so that's our COVID story. Glad to have caught a later variant which, after lots of jabs, seems self limiting. But I still wouldn't wish what I had on anyone. We are still both waiting to test out of quarantine. My tests are coming back positive at day 8 and Joel's at day 5. My parents have to drive up to Canada tomorrow so we're hoping we change the tide in the next 24 hours. We couldn't have cared for the kids  without them and are incredibly grateful for family.  

Cautiously Optimistic

It's May 1st, the birds are singing and it's not terribly hot out so I've been gardening while Joel is fishing with the boys. A perfect lazy Sunday. Loads of coffee, cat conversations, and just a sense that I'm perfectly happy with a day at home. In January we branched out from just school to having the boys in various after school things. Skateboarding, Capoeira, Baseball, Carpentry,  and they still do piano too. Children's programs dropped outdoor masking after the Winter surge and then in March, at various dates, some districts made masks optional everywhere. That was a huge change for everyone. Having been burned by that happening right before Delta most of our circle have been pretty conservative unmasking when out shopping or in a classroom. But also opening up our risk profiles a little more as this time goes on. 

We took our first family holiday to our old stomping grounds in LA since fall 2019. It was a fantastic week.

We had a home exchange place to stay in just in Santa Monica walking distance from where we used to live. We saw some old friends and ate excellent Mexican street food. Took did a spa day with a friend and Joel took the boys to see the space shuttle and we honestly caught up on a huge amount of sleep. We were cautious about crowded places and masked a lot indoors for shops but generally with all the outdoor time it felt like a perfectly relaxing family trip to do and happy to have been doing it at a time where things are on an upswing and the mood is really joyous. 

After spring break in LA we all had to COVID test again to have the kids return to school and were very pleased when our school had only two cases after that wave of testing. 

Easter came next. Again we did something we haven't done in years, we hosted the egg hunt in our garden and enjoyed a sun filled happy day basking in the rays and sipping mimosas. 

The Break In The Drought

Rain rain rain! We've had two or three of these atmospheric rivers come through so far. We usually get these in late December or January but we were certainly not complaining when the fire season came to an abrupt end with over 300mm of rain in a mere 24 hours. There was some short-lived flooding more due to the extraordinary high tides that were also happening at that time and it all resolved pretty fast. Then we had weeks of glorious warm sunny weather, shorts were worn and then another storm. This is what "winter" is mostly like for us. We get the rain stuff done in dramatic dumps and then get back to absorbing the vitamin D. The last two winters were very dry hence the phenomenal drought we were in but here's hoping this is a wet one to fill the lakes again and give us some buffer for the year ahead. 

Joel's parents drove down here as soon as the border opened to leisure travel to vaccinated guests. Our first family visitors in two years! There was much feasting and reading of stories with these bigger boys. They got their first fishing rods from grandpa and did a few fishing trips to Lake Lagunitas. 

2021 is wrapping up! Here's what would have gone into a Christmas letter had I any time to write one and get it in the mail this year. 

The boys have been in their new school now for 4 months. A is 8 1/2 and in third grade now. He is enrolled in a wilderness education program and an enriched math program and now that he's outside the Waldorf curriculum is catching up on lost time on everything. C just turned 6 and is reading everything he can get his hands on, and is eager to start skateboarding lessons in January. Both are in piano but they both are more interested in how the piano works and the music theory than actually playing music (who are these humans?) 

They both spend every moment while they are at home sketching machines, wiring circuits, programming robots to do things, or building lego. A is dead set on attending MIT to study robotics. C is so far angling for mechanical engineering. They have big plans. Needless to say, it was time to move them from the  into this inquiry-led program this year. I'm not hearing moaning anymore about everything being too slow or boring. I think we'll be well placed here for a few years yet. 

My work drastically changed this fall as I rebranded my solo self-named operation to TreeHouse and began to be known as a design group. We got really busy in October and are tapering off nicely heading into the holidays. Lots of branding work as well as some projects for me with returning clients and local government. I was featured in a book about women in leadership, which was deeply flattering and quite unexpected. 

Joel's company, VIM, has begun to reap what they sowed so doggedly over the past three years. The sacrifices,  and sleepless nights are turning into deals and partnerships with household name brands. Not many start-ups rose out of the pandemic hiring and growing. But here we are. 

We are heading back to Canada by car in a few days. Our first time back since Christmas 2019. We're keeping it small and safe, a week with Joel's parents and then a week with mine. A Home Exchange family is heading here to keep watch over cat and home. 

Whatever 2022 brings, lets hope it brings healing, good health, and lots of aha moments.

What We Did This Summer

 The Summer began with this burst of optimism as vaccination rates soared into the 90%s here. A few close friends we've only seen for socially distanced cocktails in the yard all year came in for a hug. I went away for a night with a close friend and stayed in a hotel and dined in style in Sonoma (though still avoiding indoors and crowds). We drank champagne and toasted our new year ahead. 

Look how happy!

After a massage and a walk through the gardens at Cornerstone I was feeling pretty great. The following week our pod family gave us a night away for father's day. Joel and I stayed in the legendary Olema House Inn and again enjoyed a patio dinner and once the restaurant cleared out late that night, we came in to enjoy a nightcap with the place to ourselves. Tiny steps toward normal. 

And somehow, we managed to take the leap of faith and send the boys to school last week. 

The Lost Birthdays

 

A couple of days before the beginning of lockdown in 2020 we were supposed to be hosting a 7th Birthday for A at the Lego play space near us. One by one all our guests had rescinded their RSVPs. We cancelled the party much to his disappointment but he is an incurable optimist and he rallied that day and enjoyed his gifts and cake and watched a movie with his friends online. As the year went on, every other kid had a COVID era birthday without the party or trip to the movies. Yesterday we had our very first gathering outside the pod with two families who we haven't seen in ages, we decided to celebrate all the kids birthdays. We sang, they had goodie bags and we hope they enjoyed a little piece of optimism of all that is to come this year. 

The Road To Normal

Things are rapidly changing in California now that counties like ours have inched past 80% vaccination in the 16+ age group. People (mostly boomers who are finished their second doses) are out on the streets, or sitting at outdoor cafes looking like they are with someone from outside their household and it's safe for them to do that - wow! Our numbers are down into very low digits for daily new cases. The CDC just announced that fully vaccinated adults don't need to mask outdoors anymore, unless they are in a crowd. It's so different to see that same group of seniors who were our most dedicated maskers now smiling and unmasked. In a couple of weeks we'll be far enough past our second shots to join the outdoor group getting rid of the 'ol masks tan lines (OK I don't tan but apparently mask tan lines were a thing). 

We went on a road trip to visit Joshua Tree National Park a few weeks ago and were invited to visit dear friends in Palm Springs on the way. In their pod, most are fully vaccinated and one person just partially vaccinated. Meanwhile we were partially vaccinated and kids are not vaccinated. It was tricky to navigate but we read a bunch of articles with epidemiologists laying out safe scenarios and we followed these new protocols. Despite the careful planning, it felt like a natural homecoming and a bit surreal. Just seeing our friend's faces and having a family catch-up. What a dream. 

Our next challenge for our pod all getting vaccinated is, how do we open up and with whom and how fast? We've had a lot of discussions so far. I think our priority is to each choose 2 families with fully vaccinated adults we would like to reconnect with and just stay at that level of open-ness for awhile. Keep kids masking and stay outdoors but it's a huge step toward being social again. There are things our group is definitely not going to do yet like eating inside a restaurant or going to an indoor gym. Apparently Dr Fauci is saying he also is not doing those things so we're not that unusual I think. 

The After Times

It's hard to describe the feeling of living here post inauguration. We got to the end of the week on Friday and no one had a drink in their hand, because just juggling work and kids and the usual stress of the Pandemic hadn't worn us down quite the same way as it did during the T**** era. I don't expect the harm to be erased, or the fights to be over, but knowing that functional adults are back in charge is incredibly good news. Just that look of glee on Fauci's face when he addressed the press spoke more to the people than any words could say. Help is here. It will get better. 

New Year Wishes

I can't really make a resolution. 2020 is still lying on the floor laughing at my list from last year. On the 31st we wrote on wish paper, lit it and watched it rise off the table and fall in floating grey ash clouds. 

What I hope happens this year is that we get enough vaccinations out there that our front line workers are safe and the deaths in care homes from COVID end. I feel somewhat confident that by summertime we could see case rates fall to levels low enough to risk a road trip back to Canada. I feel fairly confident that the kids will return to some kind of school in person in the fall of 2021. 

I don't think we'll really truly take a family holiday till Summer 2022. Our dreams of returning to France or doing a trip to Northern England, Scotland and Ireland might be possible then. 

We wonder what world travel might be like then. Will EVERYONE be suddenly taking the trip of a lifetime just because now they can? Will the usual haunts be so crowded that it's all like the Louvre in August or will people step out cautiously... maybe the financial ruin of the pandemic will still hinder most from leisure. 

I do feel wildly optimistic about one thing, 2021 has got to be better than 2020. To that I raise a toast, may we meet in person someday not too far off, and HUG. Seriously, think about it. Hugging.